HIBIRD: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual
by Lulu-ichigo
Summary: Congratulations! You are now the owner of a HIBIRD unit! In order to boost the functions of your own cute, yellow mass of fur to its prime, it is recommended that you read the following manual carefully.


**A/N:** hey guys! I figured I should give this one a try since it's so popular with you guys. Today I've taken on hibird because it seems that no body has done this before. So if I'm wrong, and someone had already done something like this, please tell me. Enjoy~

**Disclaimer: **I do not own KHR, or this wonderful idea that Theresa Green had made.

**XXX**

**HIBIRD: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual**

**CONGRATULATIONS!** You are now the owner of a HIBIRD unit! In order to boost the functions of your own cute, yellow mass of fur to its prime, it is recommended that you read the following manual carefully.

**Technical Specifications**

**Name:** Hibird (does not respond to other names, although if you prefer calling him furball, tweety, yellow pompom or the like, go ahead)

**Age:** _unknown_

**Place of Manufacture**: Namimori, Japan

**Height:** 8.5 cm

**Weight:** 100g

**Length:** please do not ask anything about this matter, or the HIBARI KYOYA unit will bite you to death. Yes, he will kill you. Seriously.

**Your HIBIRD unit comes with the following accessories:**

One _mini surveillance camera_™on a collar

One _mini blue scarf_

One light grey _mini beanie _hat

**Removing your HIBIRD unit from his box**

Removal of the HIBIRD unit is practically easy. It is not violent like the HIBARI KYOYA unit and will not require any precautions. Although, at some cases, the HIBIRD unit may refuse to come out of its box. If this happens, put your HIBARI KYOYA unit to make him go out, or if the first suggestion is impossible, (because you'll probably be bitten to death by ordering him you HERBIVORE!) play the Namimori Anthem or lure it out with some treats.

**Programming**

After you successfully take out your HIBIRD unit, you will notice that it comes with a variety of useful and super-cute features:

**Pet:** as its first and main use, this great ball of yellow is an excellent pet. It's cute, it's furry, and it's yellow. What more can you ask for?

**Talented Singer:** the HIBIRD unit has been programmed to sing beautifully. Want to win that pet contest in your town? Why not enter your HIBIRD unit! It will surely earn a lot of money for you. Although, try not to teach your HIBIRD unit weird songs especially those with the words _'gay bar'_ in it. And if you did, well don't let it sing in front of the HIBARI KYOYA unit. We will not be held responsible for the damage made.

**Spy:** want to know if your boyfriend/girlfriend is cheating on you? Do you want to tail that person you oh-so-love-you're-obsessed-with-him/her, you stalker? Or do you want to creep in people's bathrooms and watch girls (or boys) bathe, you voyeur? Why not make your HIBIRD unit do it! Equipped with the _mini surveillance_™ camera, you can make anyone or your town under surveillance.

**Cosplay:** are you going to that convention as Hibari Kyoya? Tag your HIBIRD unit along and make those fan girls believe you're the real deal!

**Your HIBIRD unit will come in the following modes:**

_Hibird (default)_

_Sing-bird_

_Ultra-singing-frenzy (locked)_

As stated above, the HIBIRD unit does not have many modes because the _Hibird _mode covers almost all of its main functions.

The _Sing-bird_ mode activates when your HIBIRD unit is not doing anything, or when it is bored. It will sing the Namimori anthem and call out 'Hibari, Hibari!' repeatedly so prepare yourself and your ears. You can teach him other songs but beware of the word _'gay bar'_ (see **Programming**,).

The _Ultra-singing-frenzy _mode will be unlocked if: a) it is EXTREMELY bored or, b) you taught him too many songs. The HIBIRD unit will sing endlessly until your ears bleed. To avoid this, be sure to keep it occupied by ordering it to do some of its functions, or don't teach it too many songs in a day. The HIBIRD unit is not a substitute for your I-pod or MP3.

**Relationships with other units****:**

**HIBARI KYOYA:**this extremely violent and hot unit is originally its master. It will stick to this unit if you aren't careful. But if you want to make your HIBIRD unit very happy, give it to the HIBARI KYOYA unit and giggle like a crazed fan girl with the cuteness they exude.

**Cleaning**

Your HIBIRD unit will require help cleaning itself, because obviously, it's a freaking bird. Be sure to buy the gentlest soap/shampoo there is for birds. Drying isn't much of a necessity since bird's feathers are water proof. But if your HIBIRD unit requires help on that, blow dry him gently. NEVER dry it with a towel.

**Feeding**

The HIBIRD unit requires more vitamins and minerals to keep its fur/feathers smooth, fluffy and yellow. Ask your vet for additional details on some supplements. Other than that, the HIBIRD unit eats normal bird food.

**Rest**

Ample rest is needed for the HIBIRD unit, as it needs energy to sing. Make sure it has its own pillow (Do not give it the ones with down stuffing, it might think you're a bird killer) and never take it in to a cage. All HIBIRD units enjoy its freedom.

**Frequently asked questions**

**Q:** My HIBIRD unit had completely disappeared! What should I do?

**A:** your unit probably found a HIBARI KYOYA unit and went with it. Unfortunately, that cannot be helped. Just buy another unit or purchase both.

**Q:** my unit is calling me Hibari. I kept teaching him my name but it doesn't respond. What should I do?

**A:** have some patience. Someday it will recognize you as its new master. The HIBIRD unit is programmed to call out its original master so it cannot be helped.

**Q:** is my HIBIRD unit female or male?

**A:** that matter is completely unknown; however, it appears the HIBARI KYOYA unit knows what its gender is. So you can ask him. And prepare to be bitten to death.

**Troubleshooting**

**Problem: **the unit's _ultra-singing-frenzy _has been activated.

**Solution:** the only way to deactivate this feature is make the HIBBARI KYOYA unit pet it. That is not likely to happen, so good luck on that. You could try petting it yourself, but I doubt it will respond. So you better find an ear donor or something like that. Or, you could flee town.

**Problem:** my unit turned in to a super duper fluffy ball of fluff!

**Solution:** Congratulations! You have just made your HIBIRD unit cuter than it already is. You probably over dried it with a blow dryer. But if you want to turn it to its normal state, you can wet it again and dry it gently and all will return to normal.

**End notes**

Under the Cute Pets™ category, your unit will surely satisfy your needs and cravings for cuteness. When treated properly, the HIBIRD unit will be a wonderful amusement and a useful ally or pet. Give it respect and surely it will provide you the best songs and the same respect it gives to its original master.

XXX

**A/N:** Leave me a review 'kay? Thanks for reading!


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